Motivation

It's been a while since I last wrote something (2 freaking years lol). This is a proof showing that student life is not as glorious and fascinating as I thought it would turned out to be. I even doubt if I had chosen the right path, since all these buildings drawings, robotic and precision and stereotype have been driving me crazy. Unlike freely dancing pencil on the paper surface, with immerse imagination to create whatever you want, you are now restricted and confined with structure, physic laws, the will of others and the subjective judgement of critics. Should have thought of that before ever jumping down this cliff!

I miss drawing, I miss my stories, I miss all my witty and marverlous characters so much that I feel like my heart's about to dehydrate and turn into dust. With all the lack-of-motivation and the need to use all my inspiration such as energy for designing dead objects, I cannot seem to find room for the every day drowning in heavenly drawing and writing world anymore. Part of me is missing. No, the "me" in me is missing. I am sure of the fact that I cannot and will not live like this anymore.

Unfortunately I'm the kind of person that always would go to the end of the road if I started something. So in the next 2 years I'll just have to bite my tongue and get the degree. Mind you, the competition in this branch is absolutly impressive. I believe one can even compare it to a survival fight. You can't build something entirely new, there is always someone who has already done it. You want to be different with the packs and threw in something entirely strange and out of ordinary? You will never get the approval or a better score than those who present cubic design or a Mies-like-concept. Take that, modern architecture. Always the same. Of course there are exceptions from geniuses but appearently the number of standard average soon-to-be-architects is rather overwhelming. Although a background is always essential for the main focus to shine.

I'm hoping this post will be a start for me to partly go back to do what I love to do, instead of forcing myself to finish before deadlines and satisfy other people all the time. If thing does not change, I might as well go shot myself.

Portrait

Well I have to submit a photo of myself for the yearbook. Since it can be a drawing and I have some free time, I try something I've always wanted to try: Draw something I can look at it and grin like an idiot ( because I simply adore this piece). 

This is somewhat me, somewhat a character I created (also happens to be my second favourite protagonist out of all of my stories). It's been like forever since I am ever satisfied with any of my work. Hope this will last at least a day. XD

Night Visit

What I spent my time doing at school ....
The school work loads are enough to choke you, believe me, but I just can't help myself. I start doodling every moment a pen/ pencil or anything writing tool gets in my hand.

Metamorphosis of Narcissus (reproducing)

You all know Salvador Dali's Metamorphosis of Narcissus. May assignment in art class to reproduce a classic into popart style.

 I didn't like it much at first but I guess it grew in me given time. Ah, my hands are black and blue (literally) due to the spray colour. The funniest thing was that some of the spray colour got into my face. I was wondering why people stared at me strangely on the street and in the bus, until I looked at myself in the mirror at home llloooolllllllll.

Art is humankind's most finest acquired knowledge

Pictures by Demian.


I am officially a new devoted lamb of this artist. There is no more to say, you are blessed with the finest most magnificent talent and view. You use it exceptionally well.

Gourmet holidays

I have to admit, since I was small, I have always had the best or have been given the best things in general. It's not like I'm spoiled, well actually perhaps a bit, but one has to know about such things to possess them. As immoral as my true self is, I have quite a classy elegant taste in every aspect of life. Personally I like how I have become after all those year even though I always think I'm a waste of space. Here we come to the contradictory circle again.

As I was saying, my knowledge of food is, arrogantly and truthfully speaking, an ocean wider comparing to most people, except the expert journalists or chefs or food judgers, since in all my life I have known only one person in contact that know more about food than I do. That brings us to the main topic of this post: All the foods I've been having in this holiday. As a matter of fact, I have this kind of food almost every day, so it is nothing special anymore. However I need an outlet since most of my friends probably have no idea what I'm talking about when I explain it to them. Moreover I decide to brag less about my "upper-class" life to them lately, guess I need more friends who are on the same wave-length and have the same knowledge as me. Not that I'm complaining, but they are incredibly hard to come by.

For my personal interest I shall make a list, so we can eat something differently next year.

Christmas Eve: Pomelo with prawns salad, salmon and tuna terrine, beef tongues and potato salad (the one with peas, hams, boiled eggs etc), stewed pigeons stuffed with lotus seeds, apples and chestnut. For desert some Irish Coffee mousse with cherries sauce and Chocolate mousse. After that a cheese platter with about 10 different kinds of cheeses which I'm too lazy to name all and trout caviar with sour cream.

2nd Christmas day: Forgive me, my family tends to bend toward the traditional side. Goose in the oven, red cabbage, Brussels sprouts, Semmelknödel (surprise, it's like that in English too), Klöße. For desert champagne sorbet and mojito sorbet. I'll just skip all the afternoon tea with cookies, cakes, lebkuchen and biscuits. 

2 days after that: Cold soba noodles with salmon roe and ebi tempura for lunch (I stayed at home alone so might as well make my favourite food). Dinner came and fridge is full so it's lamb with spätzle and stir-fried spinaches. Not really my type of food btw.

Then: grilled fish fins with mashed potatoes, rucola salad with lettuce and red bell peppers (fridge cleaning).

Someday after: grilled Crayfish (or small lobster) with lemon grass and garlic, tom yam gung with chanterelles (shoot me if I remember all the mushroom varieties), larb moo (pork) and sticky rice.

Presumably it'll be raclette for new year, another mess of varieties of vegetables and meats and other food plus chocolate fondue. I'm having my pomegranate fetish lately.

It's a wonder I have always been a skinny type since I was small. Suddenly I want to eat pomegranate after naming all these dishes.

Yukimura Shoutarou

You will always be the best bushi I've ever known in my life.